Struggling

When I arrived at the council building there was a large fence towering above me. Builders worked by the front doors, so I had to find another entrance. As I walked inside, there were no sign posts, no one to ask for directions. I began the day feeling optimistic but it was not to last.

After several minutes I asked one of the 'official' ladies who watched me stand awkwardly in front of her, who then informed me that I was in the wrong area of the building and had to go left, inside a large hall full of colours and people. Inside the hall there were several desks, machines, circular see-through offices standing in the middle, a café, posters and chairs scattered around the place unordinarly.

It was strange that Bath council, the place where I were to ask for financal help, was to represent my situation in such a terrifyingly realisitic way. There were several voices in the background which disorienated my surroundings and no obvious point or reception to ask who to talk to. I stood nervously, trying to pinpoint what exactly I needed to do, but the only information I recieved from friends and my career consultant was that 'the council could help'. And so I stood and watched the circus before me. Slowly, the despair I had been feeling for the last few weeks began to reboil in my blood. Just as I was about to turn around a lady said something to me, but I couldn't understand her. She walked to another person and left me with them, who asked what I needed.

This lady was far easier to talk to, and she recommended I talk to the Citizens Advice Bureau. She told me to 'take a seat' which I found a little funny as there were small groups of seats everywhere and I had no idea which seats she meant. I guessed and waited my turn.

Cutting the story short, I eventually met a lady from the CAB who was very helpful and kind. She listened to my situation and pinpointed me to to talk to housing benefits, knowing that I had no where to live. She also said I might be able to get a list of landlords from them, but when we asked a lady together she did not want to help and seemed to think it was ridiculous that we were to even ask her. The lady we talked to together said there was absolutely no chance in getting a council house/flat/etc, then complained about how busy she was and how understaffed it was today. I moved on to another section of the hall and the staff wrote on the paper what housing benefits I might be entitled to. Only, she would only know for sure when I were renting.

Then I saw a good friend, and the despair went away for a little while again.

Moon Flower

Despite being 21 I still don't have regular periods. But today is the dawn of the moon flower and I feel like I have suddenly doubled in weight. It's work today. I better stop stalling and get ready.

Forward thinking

When life gets busy my blogs tend to get a little left behind. After having a good conversation with an old friend who reminded me about my blogs I thought it was time for another update.

So what have I been up to recently?

It is the beginning of a brand new journey, as university slowly comes to a close and old friends leave the area. There have been many gatherings and farewells which has hasn't really sunk in yet. I hope to stay in the area personally, although Bath itself is very expensive. I'm looking for cosy looking places where I could live by myself or with a non-student close friend. I would like to move forward, get another job and set myself up to start a company at the beginning of next year.

I will be having to skip sofa to sofa but I think the effort is a good investment for a pleasant future for me.

Recently I hosted my own gathering to celebrate my 21st birthday. It was fantastic - a lot of my close friends attended and I felt truly loved. It was a wonderful experience to see friends new and old, and even to conduct a successful Paranoia RPG improvisation with my friends. Paranoia is one of my favourite rpg tabletop games and tends to get good reactions from friends who play it with me, I would like to make a blog post about it in the future. In short, rpg games such as Paranoia encourages my confidence and storytelling skills. I hope to host other games, especially horror themed.

Also at my birthday two wonderful chefs baked me delicious cakes which was amazing, both to look at and to eat! Unfortunately I don't have any photos, but they brought a huge smile to my face. When I came home the following day my parents also gave me a cake with a special photo made of icing on top. Of course, it was myself at one years old. It was both embarrassing and awesome at the same time. I was also lucky enough to receive a violin and I have been practising Rains of Castamere. Perhaps I shouldn't advertise my instruments so much though, otherwise no one will want to live with me again in the future!

On that note, one of my housemates this year said that they found me a great housemate to live with which really touched me. I really adore every friend I've had this year, everyone has been fantastic.

I have of course been delving in the creative side of life, as always. Other than practising music I have been writing both fiction and academia. I have also been working on my games, The Girl and the Dragon, Little Cat and a brand new game called 'Cognatus' which I am very excited about. I will probably introduce it in the near future.

Anything else?

Well, recently I went to Bristol Zoo and really enjoyed my time. I found the experience very interesting and enjoyed how informative each exhibit was. I learnt a lot about various animals I had never seen before and have thus have an even longer list of favourites.

I found the aye-aye was the most fascinating and enjoyable little creature to watch. They were quite curious and remarkable in the way they behaved and moved. Bristol Zoo has a special section with very low lighting which will make it inaccessible for some. However, it features several creatures that thrive in such conditions including the aye-aye and the sand cat, so I do recommend it a visit!

And...?

And lastly, in between tidying the house and academia I have been playing games such as Civilization V and reading books such as The Moon Child which I hope to be reviewing soon.

I think that's it, so alas, ciao for now :)