Living

Right now I find myself typing on my Nanna's computer, sitting next to some freshly printed cupcake recipes. To my right, the window dictates that this afternoon has become a lot sunnier since this morning, highlighting the brown-red brick of two semi-detached bungalows.

Inside, my 3DS lays still with minimal power, and my magic the gathering cards are laid almost carelessly across the dining table. I will need to tidy up before dinner. There is a bowl of cereal that I have been eating now and then, between sentences. I can hear the nostalgia of the commercialised 'pop' of the rice crispies lightly filling the silence when I pause for a moment and think about what to type next. The keyboard makes each new word sound like an effort, or an expression. I like how with most keyboards, certain types of keys always sound different. For example the space bar tends to have this 'lighter note', perhaps a 'ta ta', while the letters sound a bit dull 'tol tol tol' or 'dol dol dol'. The backspace on this keyboard is more a sharp 'Wa wa wa'.

I also notice that, slouched on the table with long handles poking in various angles, are some saucepans. A gift from my auntie, reinforced by my grandparents. Their silver reflects some of the window light. I think that's poetic. It's an awful shame really, that I might not be able to use them soon. I might be moving again.

Recently, a couple of people have asked me what I would like to do, how would I like to move on. I've told them, I don't really know right now. Often, the word 'anymore' pops in too. I don't really know what I want to do anymore. My previous ambitions seemed to have dashed in a very sudden manner recently.

My Nanna watched me type these paragraphs, and I paused for a moment. She smiled and told me how she liked to watch how fast I could type. I followed the smile, stood up, and told her that in Primary school I once went to the place where they make the East Anglican newspaper. I found the factory and the trip very interesting. Near the end, we passed some offices, where there were a lot of people at work, typing very fast without looking at the keys. I told my teacher "I can do that!" and I remember distinctly that the teacher said "No Stacey, no you can't." I like this memory. Later that same day, I practice touch typing. I didn't need to practice for long, as my extensive use of the computer in my childhood and as I grew older gave me all the practice I needed. My Nanna seemed to enjoy the story. I said "See, I had ambitions once!" Then my Nanna said "You still do! You just don't always see them when you're older. Sometimes things get in the way." I agreed. "That's life for you isn't it?"

We had a quick chat while I put the empty dish into the kitchen.

Life is what we make it, right?