Some progress & Petition for Audio Description for Daredevil

Recently I've found myself making a little progress here and there - which is excellent. Perhaps the beginning of finally being a productive Tulin again. I've done a little bit of writing, and I have been looking at my survey results for my thesis today.

I would also like to give a shout out to this small petition which is keen to make Daredevil, a comic series about a blind lawyer, to become available for blind readers through audio description. It is not the best written petition, but I think the goal is important. Why wouldn't you have this material available in other formats?

Uninteresting Photos

So I thought my blog was starting to look a little bit boring so I changed the theme and decided to put in some new photos. Of course, I can't be having this blog look too exciting - that wouldn't be fitting with the current mood - So! Here are some uninteresting photos that I have taken recently.

My cheap CoOp pizza, with a big onion in the middle.

A cat on a roof.

Watching cat on the roof.

Cat.

Cat play.

Cat Stare

I guess I'd better make a small shout out to Sticky, who is a cat fan. *hugs* Ciao.

Procrastination with Duolingo

I have a lot of important things to do.

So I log back onto Duolingo and decide to practice my French. I'm finding everytime I visit after a long period, I can remember just that little more, which is very nice. I've noticed they have also got Turkish available for English speakers in beta now. I would like to learn, but I think it would confuse me a bit too much. It also amuses me that Klingon is going to be a thing on Duolingo. I respect those who can make up languages, and equally those who decide to learn them for the fun of it. I am not sure how Duolingo will profit from Klingon interpreters though.

I am drinking some cheap cloudy lemonade. Sip sip sip. It doesn't taste too great. Too much lemon. Not enough artificer, know what I mean?

I've also been using Habit RPG recently. Having joined an active party, it's been quite encouraging to see mature users who have been through very similar circumstances and made it through the other side. You can make a to do list which is standard, as well as a 'dailies' list. Everytime you complete a task, you get a some gold and exp, just like a rpg. On my dailies I have done quite a few today. Ventured outside. Did something I didn't want to do. Made an effort to tidy up. I have three remaining.

• Write 100 words of story/blog/poetry
• Work on Thesis
• Hit your daily word count.

Priorities eh?

~

Travelling again.

Nothing too exciting to report, just remembering old faces, old places, that kind of thing. Once again. A somewhat dreary whisper of things could have said, should have said but never said nor sung nor rung from the floor to the second floor, or furthermore, that kind of catastrophe that stops the approach of a renewed contact, a renewed pact, perhaps a renewed friend, nevermore.

I'm somewhat drifting.

Been very tired today, slept most of it. It's very hazy inside. Brain fog, I like to call it. Tiredness in the blood, I suspect.

I have a confession to make. Not sure when I'll write it, but it's something I'd like to explain sometime. It tangles around the subject of escapism for me. And another subject, an interesting dream. One that didn't hold familiar faces (though ironically, I don't really remember what they look like anymore.) or places, or races - the kind of thing when you're simply running clockwork, a kind of manual labour kind of dream. Not my favourite, 'cos they seem to increase that every growing onslaught of tiredness.And that leads to simply being too tired to be me, and beyond that, too tired to any degree, commit to things, make things and simply do the do. 

Dream. Based in the future. Not space, nor ship, but in a different reality than before. I play as a scientist, short black ponytail, tallish, unnecessary lab coat. We are studying a subject. A very short woman, about 2 and a half feet tall. Very small hands. Again, black hair, but this time in pig tails. I don't think her style was her choice. This woman decides to escape. It is my duty to prevent her from doing so, but I decide enough is enough. We run and end up heading to the female toilets. I was worried she was going to go inside the toilet and flush herself down - to try and escape through the sewer system. She explains that is possible, but she's got a better idea. She simply opens the door and steps through an invisible portal and disappears.

The dream splits. In one reality, I don't go through the portal. Maybe I tried and it didn't work. I decide to head back, I talk to my colleagues, one with a brown ponytail. Her face decorated by sharp makeup and defined cheek bones. She laughed and said it was fine, that Red Alert will think of something for them. It was this time that I realised the way they thought was like a drone. They were not creative, they were simply doing, and living meaninglessly, their actions predetermined by a computer.

Then in another reality, I do go through the portal. I end up watching some Turkish performers who were dancing. There is a man next to me, his dark brown hair in locks. We end up talking an making friends. This dream is in fragments, I don't really remember it so well. But there were iPhones and... Stuff. The man asked me to translate the Turkish, which was never spoken but there was a white chatbox beside their faces, with written Turkish inside- I had no idea, but used my iPhone to google it. I remember the letters, so as I write this blog, I googled it. 'iyi sucle deir' according to google means 'good is also guilty'. My friend who is very good at languages including Turkish didn't make too much sense of the phrase, as it is difficult to translate without context. It might also mean 'A good crime mill escapes me' what doesn't seem nearly as cool.There were some other 'Turkish' phrases, but they do not mean anything. I remember having to explain that I was actually not from this time, and lived in the past (or our current present as it is now) but the man seemed to accept it. I woke up to 'Gregory, Gregory, Gregory!' Apparently while at Judo, Greg pocket dialed his mum.

I went downstairs and ate lasagne.

Running/Walking

Despite all the best intentions from friends and family, all the kindness and the roses and the praises...
Despite all the love and the smiles, and the miles and miles I've recently travelled,
I just cannot help but think "I cannot do this."

It's because it's true.

About half an hour ago I kept on writing. I usually try to have some kind of positive spin at the end of my posts, but I simply was not getting anywhere. Sometimes, it's healthy to rest for a bit after certain events happen - rest, and then go back to being productive. I've rested, but the productivity isn't really happening. I need to figure what I can actually do I suppose.

Living

Right now I find myself typing on my Nanna's computer, sitting next to some freshly printed cupcake recipes. To my right, the window dictates that this afternoon has become a lot sunnier since this morning, highlighting the brown-red brick of two semi-detached bungalows.

Inside, my 3DS lays still with minimal power, and my magic the gathering cards are laid almost carelessly across the dining table. I will need to tidy up before dinner. There is a bowl of cereal that I have been eating now and then, between sentences. I can hear the nostalgia of the commercialised 'pop' of the rice crispies lightly filling the silence when I pause for a moment and think about what to type next. The keyboard makes each new word sound like an effort, or an expression. I like how with most keyboards, certain types of keys always sound different. For example the space bar tends to have this 'lighter note', perhaps a 'ta ta', while the letters sound a bit dull 'tol tol tol' or 'dol dol dol'. The backspace on this keyboard is more a sharp 'Wa wa wa'.

I also notice that, slouched on the table with long handles poking in various angles, are some saucepans. A gift from my auntie, reinforced by my grandparents. Their silver reflects some of the window light. I think that's poetic. It's an awful shame really, that I might not be able to use them soon. I might be moving again.

Recently, a couple of people have asked me what I would like to do, how would I like to move on. I've told them, I don't really know right now. Often, the word 'anymore' pops in too. I don't really know what I want to do anymore. My previous ambitions seemed to have dashed in a very sudden manner recently.

My Nanna watched me type these paragraphs, and I paused for a moment. She smiled and told me how she liked to watch how fast I could type. I followed the smile, stood up, and told her that in Primary school I once went to the place where they make the East Anglican newspaper. I found the factory and the trip very interesting. Near the end, we passed some offices, where there were a lot of people at work, typing very fast without looking at the keys. I told my teacher "I can do that!" and I remember distinctly that the teacher said "No Stacey, no you can't." I like this memory. Later that same day, I practice touch typing. I didn't need to practice for long, as my extensive use of the computer in my childhood and as I grew older gave me all the practice I needed. My Nanna seemed to enjoy the story. I said "See, I had ambitions once!" Then my Nanna said "You still do! You just don't always see them when you're older. Sometimes things get in the way." I agreed. "That's life for you isn't it?"

We had a quick chat while I put the empty dish into the kitchen.

Life is what we make it, right?

Back again

Goodness me, it's been a while.

I have missed the Internet dearly. There are so many questions I have wanted to ask, but have not been able to find the answers to. There are also friends I have wanted to speak to, but have struggled to stay in touch. Hopefully today will be the start of good things. I could do with good things happening.